Breaking news! The crisis between Dorkmania and Targia

Breaking news!

The crisis between Dorkmania and Targia

Dear Targians we would like to give you an update about the fact that Dorkmania has been using our men as guinea pigs to test all their new medicines. This has had dramatic consequences for our strong and smart men, who are returning weak and dumb. We know you are concerned, but we finally found a solution. 

Dorkmania admitted that they have been testing all kinds of medicines on our strong men, but are now realizing that our men are too superior to just test random medicines on. Therefore, they are proposing to make our men even stronger by giving us free steroids to make them invincible. We know you might be concerned that they are lying, but with our dominant behaviour, we came to an agreement. Dorkmania will do several tests on animals first afterwards, they will provide us with a detailed report about the results. Our top alpha males will analyse this report and if it is sufficient, they will provide us with free steroids as an apology for trying to disobey us. If the results aren’t up to our standards, we will require them to keep working on these steroids.

Once we have acquired the powerful steroids, you will have the opportunity to get them at your local municipality or during your military service. These steroids will enforce our military power and ensure that we stay the most powerful military service in the world.

May the Light be with you!